Just in Time

So this is the beginnings of my new project the Ingenue sweater from the Custom Knits book. It's a top down sweater which is my favorite style, as I hate finishing work. So having those sleeves already integrated is pretty fab for me. The smooshy Malibrigo worsted wool is as soft as it gets. Being a single ply I worry about longevity, but I long to have a full, next to the skin sweater of this fantastic yarn. And the fantastic hand-dyed colors - gorgeous. This colorway is called Ibiza, which is for these deep bluish/greens.

I wont be able to finish this in time for my Manchester holiday, but maybe I can finish it while I'm there. So excited to meet someone special in the UK and it has made time slow down to a crawl in expectation.

In trying to foster this new relationship, I've been reading a good book "If the Buddha dated", which describes the premises of being "awake" whilst being in a relationship. For me one the of the keys to remember is to be fully honest with yourself and the other person. Not that I've had an issue with this in the past necessarily. A new relationship is the other person challenging your viewpoints and helping you to awaken or see. Some of my conditioned responses perhaps might change.

It can be quite scary to fall in love though. And in my readings, the key is to accept the fear. As there is nothing else one can do, other than live without love at all. So in making yourself open and vulnerable there is the risk. The fact that we can allow ourselves the ability to do this after having past relationships fail is quite amazing. The hopefulness that love can bring. But you do have to be open and willing to have that experience. I would not have thought I had it in me and that perhaps I was too hardened. But perhaps I can open up again with love.

It is certainly the gift of having had different partners in my life which allows me to improve the process each time. I thank all of them for what they have brought to my life. I tried to let each person know how important they were and give unconditional love. I hope they all find their true bliss.

It would be nice perhaps to have mine, although the value judgement is there. The steady rhythm of a life parter. A person who is interested in a true partnership. I start to wonder these days if that is realistic, but I do feel in my soul that it is.