Misodiva Knits

New Traditions in Giving

2012-01-02T15:55:00.000-05:00

When I first started knitting, I only did it for myself. I've now decided that knitting Christmas gifts, Baby gifts, and Charity Knitting is quite satisfying as well. I think this is a round-up of all of the knitted gifts for the year. I'm modeling most of them and one with my husband.

I do hope the recipients really like their gifts. It's hard as there are so many specific washing instructions-cold water hand, warm water washer, dryer, no -dryer. I've started telling people to just contact me when they need to wash something. No worries on that as most accessories don't need washing but a few times a year.
Sizing is always hard if the person isn't physically around. And people aren't used to knowing their head measurement in cm.
    I wanted to make some charity knitting for the St. Judes Childrens Cancer hospital, but those kids are so sick that items have to be sterile etc. Super sad. I'll still look into it though. I have taken to knitting a few things for the local GA trauma bears. We knit clothes for teddy bears and give the bear and outfit to children with abuse in the courts system. I really do hope it gives those kids a little bit of joy.

    On a daily basis I am amazed at how blessed I am with all that I have. Many factors have contributed to it, but there was a time in my early twenties, when I don't think I could have even conceived of being 40 years old. What I realise now is; you start out with nothing, but along the way you keeping getting items, and as long as you keep them, eventually, you have what you need.
     A this point now, I've got my parents, aunts, etc older people trying to give me their unneeded items as they start to downsize. My parents, older people had some type of immortality to me as a child. Now as a see them it's quite different and I feel sad. People will die, and I have not been touched by that much except the standard grandparents. It's frustrating because there is nothing I can do about it.
    I think it's the same way as well that I feel about my life and marriage. I keep thinking of Peggy Lee's song "Is that all there is?" I felt that having a child would bring back the life and vitality that I felt I was losing. I never thought about continuing the blood line, why people have children, until it was no longer available to me. I still think I want one, but it will not be part of me in that singular way. And I know that way is the best. All of the issues I have from genetics, will not plague this child. I'm starting to be able to be happy for other women who are pregnant, which is nice.
    I think about how beautiful and pretty I was in my early twenties, and yet I had such low self esteem. I went with the first man who would have me. And that is how I wound up, unmarried at 38. After 5 years of therapy I finally realised that, I, get to decide who I will be with. I started dating and met some great men, some not so good, and through all of that met my fantastic husband. I can't help to still feel regret though that other people get to start this life much earlier on. But then we wouldn't be who we are today, etc.
     So again I am grateful for all that I have and the love that is given to me.

Baby or No Baby

2011-02-23T12:40:00.000-05:00

So I started trying to get pregnant in June 2010 at age 39. I've never been pregnant before, and so my gyn. gave me a AMH test which showed a low egg reserve. That lead to a crying spell, and then a resolve to start trying. It also lead to my marriage as I wasn't in a hurry, but decided it would be best if I did get pregnant. So the first few months were just regular timed intercourse with a Clearblue ovulation predictor. I also did am temperature checks. It appeared that I was ovulating. August I started taking letrozole with each cyle.
After this all didn't work in October I decided to start seeing a reproductive endocrinologist. We starting using IUI with each cycle. In October I did get a positive pregnancy test and was really excited. A few days later when I retested it was negative. When I had the test at my MD office she said that I was pregnant and that it just didn't take. If I hadn't been paying attention so closely I wouldn't have even noticed that my period was a couple of days late.

Finally in December I decided that I would have IVF. I started this all out thinking I wouldn't go this far, but here I am. So I thought I would be out of town during ovulation cycle in January and would start in February for IVF cycle. I wound up being in town in January, but the regular intercourse didn't work. So now it is February and I have started my medication for IVF. I am on a Estrogen patch and taking a ganarelix injection x3 days.
One of the awful things that happened was I was to start a new assignment at work and due to my MD appointments needed they took me off of the assignment. They also threatened to fire me. Now they are making "allowances" for this month, but will re-evaluate in March. I think if I need to do another IVF cycle they will fire me. It's really upsetting thinking I have to make a choice between my job or trying to have a child.
Some days I think it would be better without a child, it's what I'm used to. But often I think about how happy it would be to have a family. I know there are other options, but the next few I'm not thinking about until it gets to that point. I wanted a baby with my previous boyfriend badly when I was early 30s. Then I forgot about it. But when I married my wonderful husband I really wanted to create something of love with him.
It's such a lesson on patience and desire for things you don't have. Waiting for each monthly cycle and then waiting to find out if you are/aren't pregnant. It's hard for me to think about anything else. And other life decisions are made around this one as well. I need to find a way to focus on other things while this is all going on.

Knitting Retreat

2010-06-13T09:53:00.000-04:00

Went to a Mediation and Knitting retreat in Vermont earlier this year. Vermont was much more rural than I imagined. It was very pretty with the snow everywhere, but they called it the "mud" season. The snow was melting and consequently the ground had turned to mush. I stayed at a really lovely rustic B& B http://www.highlandlodge.com/. I couldn't help thinking of the movie Holiday Inn with Bing Crosby the whole time. I had planned on doing some cross-country sking, but it was too warm for that. Across the road from the lodge was a frozen lake, and there was still one ice fisherman brave enough. I didn't stay directly in the lodge, as I booked late, but in a cottage behind it. It was fine, although the bed was a bit thin and hard. I was sharing the cottage with another knitter, but it had separate bedrooms.

I had expected the marriage of Meditation and Knitting to be perfect for me. It was the weekend after my job was made redundant, so I felt like it would be great timing. Unfortunately, I did not have that good of a time due to a few factors. The age of the participants was older than me, not enough meditation, and different interests in knitting.

I knew that the knitters would be older, and they were very nice. But there wasn't that much in common. They were also knitting different types of projects and things for grandchildren. I grew a bit weary of hearing how great peoples grandkids were. There was one other knitter who was my age and we got on really well. Interestingly her husband was from the UK, so we talked about British culture.

But mostly it was the lack of meditation that bothered me. I was expected to spend several hours of meditation a day and we only did a few minutes. The only other Buddhists were the leaders of the retreat. So it was a lot of questions about Buddhism and meditation, which I've heard many times before. I kept trying to stay in a good frame of mind about it, but really it just felt frustating.

Also I was expecting quiet and contemplation, but the women were extremely chatty. I spent the few afternoons knitting by the fireplace in the lodge which was nice. So I didn't really get the experience that I wanted. But in all things there is good and you make what you can of it. I learned that I really would rather have a real intentional sangha, where the other people are Buddhist and frequent meditators that I can learn from. Also it was a very pretty part of the country I'd not been too before.

I spent the last day by myself driving around Vermont on the way to the airport city. That last day was really fun. I went to the Ben and Jerry's Ice Cream factory tour http://www.benjerry.com/scoop-shops/factory-tours/. Awesome! Stopped and got some maple syrup, and got sugar on snow. Went to the Green Mountain coffee factory. And it was nice in general to be completely free to drive where-ever I wanted and be on my own.

Exciting thing was in the airport I met the Senator of Vermont, Bernie Sanders. I've always liked his views so it was kinda funny that he was there waiting of a flight to Washington. I've seen him on the Bill Maher show several times.

Father Time

2009-10-21T15:17:00.000-04:00

I'm starting to get think about who gets what knits for Christmas. I'm gotten some small prezzies for my knitting group, that are not yarn related. I finished this beautiful scarf for my personal trainer. She likes pink and this was a quick knit. Only took about 4 days. Lovely Malabrigo yarn from Eat.Sleep.Knit.
Also the buy-out of my company is over, but not much as really even changed? Looking at new career options. Exciting news is that I'm also looking at moving to a larger really cool house.

I'm a Slow Knitter

2009-09-26T16:30:00.000-04:00

It takes me about a month to make a worsted sweater. I've been working on this one now and I must say I love the yarn. A bit concerned as it is single ply and will probably pill. But it's so gorgeous the colors. It's Madelinetosh Pastoral in Blackcurrent from EatSleepKnit.com and the hand is fantastic.
I'm also test knitting a pattern for a friend for a felted bag project and I can't wait to see it finished. Too bad, that I'm donating it to charity, but that's actually a good thing.
I've managed to actually stay on a diet Good Measure Meals and I've lot 2 lbs. It takes a lot to stay motivated. But of course I am pleased with the progress. Also trying to get more exercise in, I can't say why I'm so resistant to that. Okay not much of an update. But isn't this yarn gorgeous!

Fijord

2009-08-28T18:57:00.001-04:00

My latest sweater is the Lemongrass Bolero pattern with Madeline Tosh Worsted I bought at EatSleepKnit. The colorway is Fijord and I cannot possibly express how much I love this pattern, color, or yarn.
First the colorway Fijord matches everything I wear as it is all variations of blues, greens, and browns. Next the pattern is so cute and perfect for wearing over things.
Finally the yarn is so soft and cuddly and superwash!
This is my first sweater that I will absolutely wear all of the time. I just couldn't be happier. And am now motivated to start working on my next Madelinetosh project out of the Pastoral yarn which is 50-50 silk wool. Yummy.

Shrug, Boleros, Capelets, Oh, My!

2009-07-24T10:47:00.001-04:00

So, I can finish a sweater in about a month it seems I did this one in June as part of a Dream In Color Shrug knit-a-long with the Ravelry EatSleepKnit group. This Madelinetosh yarn worsted in colorway Bungelow really could not be any softer and be 100% merino wool. The pattern was quite easy to follow, although I did have to focus. I also like the fact that you just knit a rectangle, and then with a couple of seams you have a little garment.

These types of garments are a bit strange though, because they are not what you would buy in a shop. They seem to be more popular with knitters. This being that you can make something to wear with less yarn and time than a full-on cardi or jumper. This only took two skeins of wool. I'm also not sure how figure flattering they are on heavier women as it stops above the mid-section. Does this then enhance the stomach? Regardless I will keep making them because I do love expensive handyed wools.

Speaking of which I have gained 5 lbs back. I just don't want to go on a diet, but I also just don't want to have this tire around my waist. So I guess I'm going back on Weight Watchers for about the 10th time. I need to find some motivation somewhere. I don't think until I get 5 more lbs. on it will happen though. The battle of the bulge is really constant and completely exhausting.

Manchester Craft and Design Centre Visit

2009-06-22T22:36:00.000-04:00

Had a great time in Manchester as usual. Also I paid a visit to this out of the way, but wonderful place. Interesting the only fiber to be found was from this project http://artyarn-yarnforward.blogspot.com/. I will be submitting a strip of my own knitting for this one. It really makes something boring (railing) very colorful and pretty. The Centre had nice ceramics and jewelry artists in booths. It was a bit difficult to find, but would be a great place to get a unique gift.

Also quite strange was the fact that I didn't knit for the whole week. I thought I had made a mistake in my Dream in Color Shrug and so I just put it down. It was strange to not be knitting every day, but at the same time I was okay. I was busy sightseeing.

Met with my Buddhist friend J. and discussed my continuing reluctance to meditate. Basically it boiled down to my need to follow rules, and fear of not being able to follow the "rules" of practice. Which seems ridiculous. So I am going to try to not think about or enforce these self-imposed rules. It was so nice to talk to someone with knowledge of Buddhism and I always learn much about myself from our talks. Wish I lived closer.

The visit did make living in Manchester more and more of a desire. I couldn't believe how fantastic the weather was there. It was actually cold and I came back to Atlanta it was 96f. The only thing did miss was my wonderful Sunday knitting group.

Need to finish it.

2009-05-13T20:13:00.000-04:00

I finished my posh yarn shawl, and it is really pretty as you can see. The pattern is called "first blush" on Ravelry.com. Now I have a fantastic shrug that I have been working on forever. Or actually not working on. I finished the body, but have to knit the edging. I thought I would never finish some of my WIPs, and yet I actually am getting that urge. Which is great. Also I am actually feeling like I have control over my wool buying because I have really reached a critical mass. So here's to finishing those things we've left undone.

Beat the Retreat

2009-05-08T23:09:00.000-04:00

I've never gone on a retreat before, and I haven't practiced with a sangha in 5 years. So going on retreat for the Memorial Day weekend seems exciting and a bit scary. In fact I've never sat more than 1 1/2 hours in one go. But the retreat I'm looking at seems well suited for someone like me. http://www.southerndharma.org/. It looks like a beautiful place and this time of year is perfect weather-wise.

Very excited about my shawl with my Posh Feb yarn. It's going to be finished sometime next week. Then on to the next project. I'm really in love with Claudia Handpainted Linen and it's so crazy because I have 100 skeins of other fibers. I should really be doing some of them, but I think how nice and useful a linen top would be this summer. So I might breakdown and buy some. Plus my friend Erin just made a really fantastic one and it is a bit inspiring. I'm also doing some nice socks with Malabrigo sock yarn color Persia. Gorgeous blues.

Good News, Bad News

2009-05-02T10:10:00.000-04:00

So first the good news, I finished this cute little sweater and it fits perfect. I've started using my Posh Yarn from the sock subscriptionhttp://www.poshyarn.co.uk/ into a cute little scarf. I'm really enjoying making lace patterns again. There is something great about yarns of stockinette stitch (goes fast, easy, can watch tv); but making lace is satisfying in a different way. You have to focus more, but the complexity adds interest.

The bad news is I still feel a bit brokenhearted . So I'm trying to think positively and use positive affirmations. Last week I felt overwhelmed with anxiety and it all seems exhausting. I don't like to be one who complains without a solution. I am trying to do the best I can.

Yesterday's topic was "there is nothing worth clinging to". Another Dharma point was you cannot sacrifice yourself for others. Which actually was the first time I had ever heard this stated so plainly. I thought the point was to focus on the happiness of others, but I guess the point is not over your own. So I think I might have been living my life I bit differently over the past 5 years if I had thought about this. Which leads me to the fact that I don't have a practice community and a teacher.

I heard the concept of "bedside buddhist" and I think I have almost become that. Basically you read the books, but if you are not practicing, I don't think you can really live it. I also think the discourse and dialogue with others is invaluable in learning.

What keeps me from going to a zendo? The same thing that keeps me from doing all of the healthy behaviors, feeling that I lack time. I absolutely love exercise and spirituality, but I don't take the time for myself to do these things. Rather I focus on doing for work. I also waste a lot of time to be honest.

A mad time was had by all

2009-04-26T21:02:00.003-04:00

Stitches South 2009. Well that was pretty fantastic, but also pretty exhausting. I took three classes, and slept through one.

First was yarn substitution, which was really helpful. Discussed the math and science into making swatches, getting gauge, and having things fit.

Second class was knit alterations, which was great, except I didn't bring swatches. But I think I now have some tools to make sweaters fit better if at the end they are not.

Third class was sweater finishing. I have to say I found this class a bit disorganized and confusing. I did learn one really great technique about a different way of performing the kitchener stitch.

Overall I learned that I absolutely must swatch for garments, and be sure to wash and weight those swatches. I always thought swatches were not washed when measuring for gauge, but apparently they are. So I hope this will all help in making new garments.

I worry because I have such expensive yarns, that I sometimes feel like I shouldn't knit with them until I get more experienced. But then I don't really want to go buy cheap yarn to knit with. So I guess I need to dive into some of my stash and go for it. I also bought tons of yarn from http://www.sanguinegryphon.com/. She is now officially my new favorite handdyer. And she is quite lovely as well.

The market was really overwhelming and a money pit. There were handdyers, acessories, kits, yarn shops, etc, etc. Probably around a few hundred of them. And I also went to the fashion show which I really enjoyed. So I also helped my friend Erin athttp://www.eatsleepknit.com/ pack orders from her big sale. But to be honest, I didn't have a whole lot of time to offer up. And I met Erin's friend Sally, who I thought was just great.

Another great event was a dinner at Scalini's restaurant sponsored by the Knitwitch, about 100 stitches attendees and it was great fun.

A Match Made in Heaven

2009-04-09T22:09:00.000-04:00

So I had some Noro Taiyo yarn and bought the Noro pattern booklet Joy. Going to make the vest pattern that the booklet says to use the yarn with. Then I get a cropped cardigan pattern by BlueSkyAlpaca, and was going to use Handmaiden Tussah Silk. But I kept thinking how the Taiyo yarn, really wanted to be made into the cropped cardigan. I resisted this marriage. But finally as I tried the two separate projects they weren't getting gauge, and the yarns were not really correct for the assigned projects.

So I gave up and am making the cropped cardigan in Noro, and I think it will probably look fabulous. I love the way Noro self stripes, so gorgeous. Sometimes you want to fit the yarn to a pattern, but the reality of it, just isn't as you pictured the garment in your head. The yarn whisperer!

Today listening zencast speaker stated that compassion is the willingness to get close to suffering. I've never really thought about it much, but I thought this was very accurate. That feeling suffering of our own isn't pleasant, much less someone elses. But to really feel compassion, you have to get close to that unpleasant emotion.

I feel like the loving kindness concept doesn't come as readily to give it to myself. I do, when I think about it, but I don't often think about it. I am usually self critical, but when I stop and think I can give myself a break.

I find the clinging and desire to be hard things to work on. I also love how buddhism uses the word "practice". Because that is what we are doing in life. We are continually practicing, it's not getting it right. But then is that really even a buddhist concept. What is, is.

I knit a dress

2009-03-29T14:45:00.000-04:00

Ugh. Okay, note to self. Remember that blocking a sweater can make it grow and grow. Also that garter stitch is extremely stretchy, especially with Bulky weight yarn. And I've got all of the weight of the bottom panel pulling that garter stitch down to my waist. So it's really a beautiful sweater, it's just sized for someone about 12" taller.

Issue is that this pattern Juliet, was written as being huge. I made the medium and thought that was going to be okay, but really I think the small is best. Also that knitting to fit, prior to blocking you can't really do. It needs to look like something that is way to small. Then in the water it is really going to open up. One good thing is I am going to Stitches South and taking an alterations class specifically for too long projects. So I am hoping there is a way to cut and reknit part of this without having to frog the whole thing and start all over. To be honest, that would have to wait for a long time.

So, making a hat as a break. And then will restart the blue Ingenue sweater. I had to rip out the stockinette increases as I was not doing that correctly. The pattern (for raglan sleeve) stated to increase every other row for 18 rows, which I thought meant only 9 increase rows. Which I couldn't understand. Then my friend Erin indicated that you increase 18 rows, but then also do the non-increase row for 18 rows, for a total of 36. Reading patterns can be so tricky sometimes.

I'm finding myself wanting to start another project. Oh, it's hard to keep on track and not get too many things going. But my Pigeonroof Silky Merino is calling my name. Or how about the lovely Posh yarn 100% alpaca from the Feb. sock yarn club.

Melancholy Baby

2009-03-22T19:23:00.000-04:00

Back from my Manchester, UK trip for about a week now. It has been hard to adjust for many reasons. First off, I had lots of dating drama that was all of my own doing. I think there was so much expectation on my part. And when you want something to be so perfect, it's almost guaranteed to be a disaster. It still makes me sad, and I wonder if it will ever feel better. Logically I do know that it will be better, and that everything takes time.

Also I am having such an issue with patience and moving over there. Financially I need to wait, but emotionally everything is in UK now. I keep reading that being happy where you are is the only way to be. Otherwise, you are just in a struggle for no reason, but...

I find the emotional parts of dating to be the most difficult to work with in Zen. I've read books: If the Buddha Dated; Sex,Love,Dharma; Be the Person You Want to Find. But when I feel my heart start to be pulled, it's so hard to maintain my mindfulness. My ego takes over. Even as I am with that person, it's still not enough, I don't want our time together to end. Of course it is that desire, that ultimately causing suffering. As everything is impermanent.

And to be honest I'm a very independent, happy to be alone person. I feel crowded if I don't get my alone time, very cranky and restless. It's hard to maintain a balance. I definitely have gotten better about this than I have been in the past. Before I would be absolutely gutted it the person didn't think I was fantastic. And now I guess my self-esteem is not built on their value of me. But it is a bit of a hit on it, sometimes. It is definitely harder to have human relationships, as you are dealing with someone else's will and desires. I know it is worth it and ultimately unavoidable.

Sundara Update Yarn Porn

2009-03-02T18:59:00.000-05:00

Beach Pebbles

Indigo over Apricot

Magic Hour

A picture speaks a thousand words. or hundred?, can't remember. Anyway when I got home today I had all of this yarn from the Sundara Feb. updates. So beautiful, her yarn really is the most amazing. This is all fingering silking merino. Super soft and 500 yards a skein. The garments from these will be so beautiful.

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Just in Time

2009-02-26T22:42:00.001-05:00

So this is the beginnings of my new project the Ingenue sweater from the Custom Knits book. It's a top down sweater which is my favorite style, as I hate finishing work. So having those sleeves already integrated is pretty fab for me. The smooshy Malibrigo worsted wool is as soft as it gets. Being a single ply I worry about longevity, but I long to have a full, next to the skin sweater of this fantastic yarn. And the fantastic hand-dyed colors - gorgeous. This colorway is called Ibiza, which is for these deep bluish/greens.

I wont be able to finish this in time for my Manchester holiday, but maybe I can finish it while I'm there. So excited to meet someone special in the UK and it has made time slow down to a crawl in expectation.

In trying to foster this new relationship, I've been reading a good book "If the Buddha dated", which describes the premises of being "awake" whilst being in a relationship. For me one the of the keys to remember is to be fully honest with yourself and the other person. Not that I've had an issue with this in the past necessarily. A new relationship is the other person challenging your viewpoints and helping you to awaken or see. Some of my conditioned responses perhaps might change.

It can be quite scary to fall in love though. And in my readings, the key is to accept the fear. As there is nothing else one can do, other than live without love at all. So in making yourself open and vulnerable there is the risk. The fact that we can allow ourselves the ability to do this after having past relationships fail is quite amazing. The hopefulness that love can bring. But you do have to be open and willing to have that experience. I would not have thought I had it in me and that perhaps I was too hardened. But perhaps I can open up again with love.

It is certainly the gift of having had different partners in my life which allows me to improve the process each time. I thank all of them for what they have brought to my life. I tried to let each person know how important they were and give unconditional love. I hope they all find their true bliss.

It would be nice perhaps to have mine, although the value judgement is there. The steady rhythm of a life parter. A person who is interested in a true partnership. I start to wonder these days if that is realistic, but I do feel in my soul that it is.

Ran outta yarn

2009-02-15T15:32:00.001-05:00

So this is a picture of some beautiful Sundara silk lace called pine over gold. I'm not sure really at all what I"ll make of it, but it's lovely to look at.This month I'm making the lovely Juliet sweater with some gorgeous handpainted Claudia Handpaints in Jungle color. And I ran out. Now with hand painted yarn this can be a dilemma, I found one vendor who contacted

Claudia and is getting some dyed for me. What would I have done otherwise. That is the problem with knitting a sweater, you actually need to have a certain amount to fit you. Whereas, scarf you don't. I guess for socks as well, but most sock yarn comes in standard 300-400 yarn skeins.

Sundara yarn had many amazing updates this month and I absolutely binged on buying amazing yarn. probably spent as much as my rent. But that is it until this summer, must be as I only have a $100 month yarn budget.

Going to Manchester UK soon, although not soon enough. I will chatting up some boys and am quite looking forward to this. Although, there is some frustration involved as I actually live across an ocean. And have not had time to actually work on getting over there, permanently. Why did I look for love so far away? Well honestly none of the offers in Atlanta were very appealing. And last holiday in Manchester, I saw so many lovely men, I could have just stood on the street and said lets spend the rest of our lives together, and probably been quite happy with it. I am a bit impulsive though.

Which leads me to the fact that I have to take things slowly due to the distance, and actually hear what the person is saying, which is probably a good thing for me. And determines if the others communication skills are any good. I do find that dating causes lots of it's own distractions and I find it hard to concentrate for my work, and house upkeep are definitely slacking.

Handdyed yarn trading

2009-02-03T12:43:00.000-05:00

I seem to have gotten rid of most of my object hoarding, shopping compulsions, but what is it about yarn? It is the colors. There are infinite color combinations. You would think-how many combinations of blue yarn does she need? Well apparently everyone that exists.

What is especially interesting to me is the frenzy and trading society of the hand dyed yarns. In order to purchase, you do not even have time to look at the website, but must just purchase as fast as you can. These yarns are so precious, that after they are acquired, most times not even cash can buy them. People will only keep them to then trade with someone else. See Woolmeise, Sundara, Mama Blue, Pigeonroof Studios, Plucky Knitter. These yarns are posted on etsy and within seconds are purchased. The dyers cannot possible dye enough for the demand.

Which makes me think, why don't they get some bank loans and expand. Instead of just the one person dying, selling, and packaging, they could outsource. Explanations have been that they are artist, etc. But if it was me, I would want to share my artistry with as many folks as possible. Yarns like Lornas Laces, Dream in Color, Malabrigo have managed to do these things it seem.

And the the concept of a yarn diet. Which is basically saying, your not going to buy anymore yarn. This is done after you have ASBLE or some such, meaning aquired stash beyond life expectancy. I am amazing at the amount of yarn people have. I think my 80+ skeins is a bit much, but there are folks who have 200, 500, 900.

With that being said, I am anxiously awaiting etsy update from Pigeonroof studios.

Knitting Hazards

2009-01-30T20:26:00.000-05:00

Now of course I am aware of carpal tunnel but???
http://http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-482143/Safety-police-outlaw-NHS-knitters-fears-accidents-needles.html

http://www.newsweek.com/id/181290/output/print

My Atlanta Arts Calendar Winter 2009

2009-01-28T09:17:00.000-05:00

Jan 30-8pm Chinese Film Up the Yangtze-High Museum $7
Feb 1-4pm Emory U. -Atlanta Bach Ensemble Schwartz center-Free
Feb 6-8pm Songs of Madness Thamyris-Schwartz Center Free
FEb 6-7:30p movie Virgin Suicides discussion Emory U-free
Feb 9-7[, Cleopatra-Film-Fox Theater-$10
Feb 13-8pm Buddy deFranco clarinet Scwartz Center $15
Feb 14-8pm Carmen Bradford jazz vocalist Schwartz Center-free
Feb 17th 8pm John Scott-organ Scwartz Center-Free
Feb 20-5pm-Friday Jazz-High Museum
Feb 20th-7:30p-movie discussion The Namesake Emory U-free
Feb 21-8pm-Japanese Film -Hula Girls-High Museum-$7
March 18-8pm Gamelan Consortium -Performing Arts Studio 1804 N Decatur Rd-free
April 5-4pm Emory Percussion Ensemble-Schwartz Center-free
April23-26 Stitches South Conference

Turn your mind away from that which is not permanent

2009-01-26T09:28:00.001-05:00

What a great quote for today. The worries of the economy, these things come and go. So really there is no worry, I have enough money and resources to get by for quite a while. Life and death these are the only things with which to occupy my time. So to make the best of my life.

Are there any jobs left?

2009-01-23T09:13:00.000-05:00

So I wake up to see that the WSJ has a new story http://online.wsj.com/article/SB123268511212809429.html. Which is my company Wyeth merging with Pfizer. It really is stunning to me and I am quite in shock. I knew something had to happen as my work has been quite slow, but I just didn't see this one. I think it was sort of in the back of my mind, but it was such a foreign possibility I didn't think of it. It seemed like all of the major mergers happened a few years back.

So, Pfizer just recently announced redundancy in it's R & D department. At least I think it will take several months for a deal to be brokered. In the meantime I can just save as much as I can, although I don't know what this will mean to my UK job search. Which my company just told me would not happen. I've posted my CV online. I guess now I'm going to have to start the Level 1 Visa process with a lawyer. Ugh, this really sucks. Fuck.

Well, I guess I knew my position was too good to be true, not to be shaken up a bit! Impermanence is the state of existence, so whatever happens will be a good adventure. Might be time to start selling off some of my yarn stash though!

New Knits

2009-01-21T21:15:00.000-05:00

So I have a gazillion projects on the needles right now. When it is so cold like this I want more little mitts, scarves, etc. But I can't knit them up fast enough. And I am really wanting to make my most beautiful Sundara Shrug. I just love the subtle varigation in this yarn color "the life aquatic".
Cannot get motivated to work, spent most of today in bed. I was so frigen cold and could not get warm. So today was a total waste. Lets hope more for tomorrow. You can always just start right over.
Good thing was my workout Tuesday with Stella was amazing. I can really feel my muscles developing and getting stronger. Was able to do more pull-ups, etc. Feeling myself get strong is a great feeling. The greatest thing I've done for myself is getting a personal trainer. Stella is a good friend and really pushes me.
I do get sick of being sore all of the time. But in away that burning sensation feels kinda good. I want to set a fitness goal as I have a weight goal. I'd like to run a race, or cycle race for a goal. Need to look into them.
ON the weight watchers tip, I've lost 10lbs hurray for me!!! Only 20 more to go. I really can't wait to see myself looking so totally skinny and awesome. I love myself, but I have to say I love myself more when my body looks the way I want it to.

Love and Obama

2009-01-20T13:20:00.000-05:00

Hell Yeah!!! Bush is gone. I just can't believe this day has finally come. I feel liberated and huge relief. It feels like Bush has been in office for decades and I am soo damn excited. What a great feeling when someone you voted for gets sworn in! Hasn't felt this good since Clinton. How did Bush ever get two terms, amazes me.
I loved the moment when Bush was going away in the helicopter and Obama and Biden were standing there waving! See ya later fucker.
I also loved that Obama gave a shout out to the non-believers in his acceptance speech! Praise to all that is holy in this world that this day has come!

Sundara updates

2009-01-16T13:51:00.001-05:00

So the elusive Sundara yarn http://www.sundarayarn.comhad the monthly update yesterday which had the artists choice updates for 100% merino sock, sport, and worsted. Sport sold out quite quickly and the others were available for about a day I guess. I ordered 2 sport skeins as it was 225 yards for $25 and this was the best deal. The yardage for the worsted was 175 yards, so it would be quite dear for a sweater! Not sure what I will do with the 500 yards of sport, but I figure the colors will be beautiful and I will find something to do with it.

Unfortunately, the colors for next month are two of my all time favorites, Pine over Gold and Blue Sky over Sugared Violet. So I will have to get sweater quantities and find some awesome patterns. I am thinking about "Hey Teach" from Knitty for Pine over Gold in worsted. http://www.knitty.com/ISSUEsummer08/PATTheyteach.html

Oddly enough I had been trading fast and furious for the Blue Sky sock, so get enough for a sweater and finally had done. If only I had known, I could buy it soon!

This month I am expecting some Sundara silk lace and sport silk.
I wore my Knitty Maja shawl yesterday and I loved it. When you wear handknits, it's funny as my Dr. I was working with turns out is a knitter. She had just started and said she was obsessed with it. I find that some people who knit, get totally obsessed, or they are not so much into it. I don't think it is something you sort of do?
Also interesting because it is so popular in the US, but I found in the UK, it was not so much. I've been asking around about this. People tend to think of it as something people did back in the day, or perhaps if they have to make do. Not a artists craft.
Finally got a GPS navigator, and I am so super excited for this. Also how amazing was the US Airways pilot who landed on the water, pretty amazing. I had always thought that would be impossible. I was in air when that happened and saw it on the inseat unit, so it was quite reassuring.

Blocking and New Project

2009-01-12T17:13:00.001-05:00

Well I've finished my most recent projects so now I have to find something new to work on. I hate that part, I look at projects then the yarn I have and try to find something that works well together. This part can take hours.

Quite cold in Atlanta which makes me want to make a long sleeved sweater, but I'm not sure if that's what I want to do. Then there are the balls of wool that I already wound, and then put back in the bin. I feel like I should use those first, but what if I don't want to. Then what if I wind another ball, thinking I'm going to use it, and don't. Then I have another new ball that is waiting to be used.
Need to block the two most recent projects, which isn't so hard, so I look forward to doing that. I only have one room in my house the cats don't go into with a door, the restroom. So it's got a small floor and then it is covered with blocked knitting on the floor. Hopefully it will dry in a few days.
Feeling tired today, and wanting to crawl back into bed and stay warm, take a nap.

Too much free time?

2009-01-10T12:31:00.001-05:00

Is there such a thing. I really don't work very hard for my job and get paid a good wage. I was thinking why is that? Sometimes I've thought it was for the good karma in having struggled so hard when I was young and very poor, on my own.
But in thinking about it today I think it is a challenge. To be self-disciplined enough to structure my own time. Often I find myself lazing about, taking naps, watching TV. Perhaps my challenge for the new year is to turn this time around and be more "productive". Or to do those things which will re-arrange the chaos in my life. And it is hard because sometimes all I want to do is knit!
I should have plenty of time for meditation, exercise, work, and leisure time. So will take the opportunity given to me to put this into action.

I quite like the Mika album, I do find these songs a bit uplifting. I am quite private in someways, but I guess is some strange way it feels hopeful or good to cast this out into the ether. It is the interconnectedness of people in that everyone I imagine feels the same way to some degree? My heart is in Manchester, UK for some strange reason. Oh, I want to move now. Patience is a virtue

Kntting as Meditation

2009-01-09T10:47:00.000-05:00

In speaking with someone recently they asked if knitting was just a distraction from the mind, or actually a mindfulness exercise. I think it is both for me. And it can be both at the same time, or one or the other. The intention is key.
Sometimes in a mindful way I say each stitch in my head as I would in counting my breath, I note the feel of the wool gliding, and the movement of my hands.
Sometimes I am watching TV and it is just something I am doing. It always calms me down as I perform the task, and so distracts me from the clutter around me, or the dishes that need doing.
Listening to the podcast Zencast yesterday they were talking about distractions and how people multitask and get this dopamine squirt as we talk on cell phones, type email, and drive at the same time. Another point is that in this uncheck mindless way, our grasping mind will start to look for new this to hold onto and make the pleasure even hightened. Her example was I love listening to Mozart, I should get a new stereo and then it would be even better. Or I love flowers, I should get more vases so I can have more flowers in the house. I really related to this view of how consumerism can take hold. This often happens to me. I think of one thing, and that can lead to 2 more things I really need to help me out. And if these things hadn't even been invented yet, I would be no worse the wiser.
Well back to the knitting. Today I will be blocking my mother's scarf and hopefully finishing my maja wrap. Then I need to find my next project. I have a pillow to piece together that I just cannot get done, I hate seaming again.
Good news the Manchester Uk office is going to speak with me on Tuesday about a temporary post over there!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I am so excited.

Jet Lag

2009-01-07T17:52:00.000-05:00

It was totally depressing to return home from England. My current focus is now to get my debts paid, and my house decluttered, asap, so that I can move to Manchester. I am really excited about making this move.
Came home to some really great yarn packages. Sunshine Yarn-Trek, Pigeonroof Studios sock yarn in dovecoat color, and finally Plucky Knitter-Mr. Coffee. The Dovecoat, I think it is quite possibly my most favorite color ever. What gorgeous socks they will make.

I love getting yarn packages in the mail, as I just love the color suprises.

Manchester Holidays

2009-01-05T13:30:00.000-05:00

Had a fantastic time in Wales and then Manchester, England for the 2 week Christmas break. Finished most of my Knitty Winter 2008 pattern Maja, but didn't bring all of the wool it needed, so I still have one more 150yard skein to add when I get home. That is good though, because it now leaves me time to make myself finish my mother's scarf out of the very pretty, but just not my color Sundara fingering silky merino.

I wanted to get together with some of the knitting groups around Manchester this visit, but just ran out of time. I had a horrible cold for most of the trip, so I was in bed for the majority of the vacation.

Excitingly, I was able to sign up for the Posh yarn club, just in time as all spots sold out in 5 min! The paypal account locked me out though, as it was a UK IP address and it was a UK business and I am from the USA, so it thought it was a fradulant transaction. Things have gotten quite interesting, as although, I entered in my user name and password correctly, the IP address still got their attention.

I really miss my knitting group and also cannot wait for all of the yarn that I ordered before the holiday that is awaiting me from the post. Oh, and also my precious baby kitties, Remy and Samantha.

Cheers!